Monday, September 26, 2011

I need to skip school more often.

Eli took me to get bubble tea and we just decided to talk in the park afterwards (a skipped day at school haha). The sun was hitting his face so perfectly...
We talked about a lot of stuff. Youtube, food (haha), past relationships...and then he popped the question.
"You know, ive never seen you eat until now. Besides that time you had popcorn when we watched Silence of the Lambs."                                                                                                                                         "Well, i usually eat lunch when i get home..."
"Dont you get hungry during the day?"
"Not really, i mean sometimes i have a diet coke or apple or something."

To be honest, it kind of made me happy that he actually noticed i dont eat. Nobody else seems to notice, or care for that matter. Its like a secret that everyones keeping. Like theres a code that everyone around me follows. they arent allowed to mention my lack of food. Drinking the bubble tea was delicious, but it made me want to cry. So many calories enters my body. Why cant i just not feel the need to munch?

I think i really like this guy. He just makes me feel good. Of course, he also distracts me from thoughts of food. I want to be alone with him again. I want to hear his deep, caring voice. He makes me feel like cloud 9, a euphoria comes over me when im with him. All smiles. I dont smile much anymore, well, at least not for real. I suppose i lie to a lot of people. Even the ones i love. But they dont understand anyway, so i dont feel TOO guilty.


  1. I used to love when people would notice my ed... But now it just gets complicated... I totally know how you feel though. I really liked this guy and he gave me the same euphoric feeling. We dated for 8 months lol. So good luck with your cutie!
    And idk if they put milk in your bubble tea where you live, but if they do you should try substituting (sp?) soy milk. it has less cals and is waaaaaay healthier. :)
    xo xo

  2. Its always nice to have somebody notice as long as they dont dwell. Now keep that in mind, if you mess up he'll notice! I'm sure your doing fine so keep on doing so well <3

    It sounds like an amazing time <3 When you said he popped the question I about pissed my pants lol :)

  3. Thank you for the comments and the support over the last few days :)

    It's great that this guy makes you feel amazing, you always need someone like that and he sounds really sweet.
    Hopefully this goes really well :)


  4. Hi. I'm new to your blog. I feel like that a lot. I mean I haven't lost a significant amount of weight yet, but I have been consuming a huge amount less and no one has seemed to notice. I'm kind of taking this as a blessing. The longer they don't notice, the longer they don't know to care.

    Good luck with Eli. =)