Sunday, November 27, 2011

It's been a while...

So, I've been slacking on this whole blogging thing. But with so many activities, school, and my internship, I have even less free time than I did before. I'm so concerned about getting into college, it's been stressing me OUT. I literally can't wait until winter break! (of course, finals come before that)
In actual news, i was doing really fucking well on dieting until thanksgiving. seriously, I never weighed myself but I could tell I was probably under 105, and probably back now, but whatever. I still need to sign up for ballet, which I'm excited for because ballerinas NEED to be thin to dance well. I've been working my ankles like crazy to get them strong. Seeing as how I'm such a perfectionist, my goal is to get on point in less than a year. I know that's crazy, but strong ankles run in the family and I have fierce willpower. I'm the type of person who will dance all night, every night to soar above any competition and....well, crush them. (: Statistics have never stopped me before.
Oh. And seeing as how I'm a complete bitch....*sigh* basically, Eli ended up asking me out. I'm sure you've noticed I'm basically in love with this kid by now. What did I do instead of running into his arms and kissing him? I frowned. I frowned and asked if we could date but not be exclusive. WHAT THE FUCK WAS I THINKING?! But luckily he agreed. I wouldn't. I would think I sound like a whore. I just don't want to be tied down right now, i guess...
Scarlett visited from boarding school. She gained a lot of weight...BAHHAAH she went from 87 to 103 pounds. Oh, goodness, so fucking FAT (sarcasm, if you were thick enough to not understand). We did black friday...I bought 2 things. I'm just a lazy cow, I don't have time to wait in long ass lines! We spent 2 AM-6AM sitting in a starbucks catching up, which was nice.
Anywhoodlepoodle, I'll eventually find time to catch up on your blogs. (: Stay thin!

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Long Thinspo! Enjoy (:

I'm in a really fucking serendipitous mood after eating only about 300 or less calories today and seeing Eli- so here's a new thinspo!

Thursday, November 3, 2011

Got the internship!

I GOT THE INTERNSHIP!!! I can't believe it!! They interviewed me today on the phone and i was so fucking nervous, but apparently they liked what i had to say. It's great because they teach you about marketing and stuff...i'd really like to start a non-profit, but i don't know anything about business, so this is great! Actually, I'm not even sure what kind of NPO i'd want to start....
So that's great. Also, my mom gave me the most amazing compliment today. I stood up after lunch ( a burger from the evil InNOut, i hate to admit) and she totally freaked out. She was like "My girl is disappearing right before me!" She started saying how skinny I've gotten and told me not to be "one of those crazy girls who become anorexic and eat only lettuce for dinner, like on Dr. Phil..." I assured her i wasn't dieting. It made me feel great when she said my tummy was flat (which it isnt...)...Guess what she gave me when i mentioned i wanted to start jogging more? One of those handy-dandy heart rate-calorie monitors! SWEET. So now i'll know how much i burn and i can share it with you guys. I even have a "jump back onto the horse you lazy pathetic person" diet i'm going for next week. the goal will be 150 cals or under a day...FUN TIMES BRO.

I've decided to do ballet after dad said i can only do one class a week until he feels i've really committed. I've been stretching my ankles like crazy. Do you know the secret, subconscious reason I want to try ballet? It's the perfect excuse to lose weight. "Sorry mom, I've just been working so hard in ballet and you do know that i need to be thin in order to perform right." It's brilliant, even better than rhythmic gymnastics (although that's tough too). Hopefully the work pays off! Stay thin everyone :) Hopefully I'll have good news soon!

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

interning, parties, being fat. The usual.

So the halloween party was AMAZING. Oh, and homecoming was pretty cool too, but a lot of people left early for Keira's party. Turns out that her college brother came with a bunch of his buddies and some extra booze ;) GREAT party favor. Basically, it felt like a swamp with all the bodies mushed up against each other, SO fucking hot. Lots of drinking, puking, smoking, and making out. typical party.

I'm so fucking excited for this next week because i'll finally be getting my permit. Im starting SO much later than i was planning because of the complicated deal with my name and social security blahblahblah. Also, I'm starting to think i might want to do ballet instead of rythmic gym. I mean, Hadar's a ballerina and she's amazing, so she can help me! I dont know if my dad would be willing to pay for it though, considering i usually end up quitting instead of committing.

I hate to say it but i've been eating like the fat pig I am. I had half a slice of carrot cake and one chunk of a chocolate bar (to try it, it was horrific). I have no idea why I haven't stuck to my jogging plan, but i need to get back into the swing of things! BIG NEWS. I completely forgot!! I might be interning for this blog thats really fucking well known. how awesome?! I signed up and theyre interested. I mean, thev've been on CNN, Today show, good morning america, THE WORKS. It's gonna look great on college applications, especially since as of now, I haven't done anything impressive....:(